i learned there’s no guilt
like the guilt of motherhood
my Tuesday lesson

tossing and turning
don’t turn remorse into gold
they make me feel old

whispers in the hall
worse than when i was in school
oh wait–i’m here. school.

we mock others’ pain
forgetting our own swallows
mixed up with sorrows

three deaths, intervention
wrap up semester’s longing
for life, a new life

we all want sunsets
bright red-circle memories
to bring back our youth

then we’d be in school
that captive institution
we couldn’t flee from

my Tuesday lesson:
mouth shut, sunsets disappear
mouth open, truth shines