beliefs

Innocent, Aging Eyes

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

as age moves into my veins
and brings wrinkles to my face,
emotions tug at places within
and brighten my eyes with tears.

at twenty i never would have cried
or understood my mother’s tears
on my wedding day, my own innocent eyes
full to the brim with smiles.

now i sit beside my growing girl
watching the autistic boy step up,
his voice singing out his solo
all the way to our back-row ears.

words elude me as the tear slips out,
rolls down the aging bones of my face,
the beauty of the moment lost
in the innocent young eyes of my daughter.

Blinded by Blue

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i can’t see
the environmental impact
of the roads
ski areas
and mines along the way.

only the blue sky
long absent
longingly awaited
the sun hot on my skin
waterfalls pouring
from every crevice
of Rocky Mountain rock
and snow still standing
obstinately against all predictions.

i will take this pain in my muscles
to bed with me
as i listen to the roaring river
and try to remember
this perfect planet
we’re destroying

but for now
for today
i am blinded by blue.

Boneyard

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the bones surround you,
starved from the dried-up sea.
you make your way through the maze,
darkness bearing down on the desert,
cold as a wintry mountain night

somewhere between the tail
and the cavernous rib cage
your pride follows behind,
a shadow of who you know you can be
lost in the wilderness of the boneyard.

you pick through pieces of skull,
sifting for the brainwaves that once
put thought into these bits of bone,
the iciness of your surroundings
building a tenacity you didn’t know remained.

your muscles tighten, the heartiest moving
you into a rhythmic undefined melancholy
through the motions of unreachable stars,
and you give in, release yourself to the night
just as Aurora touches your cheeks with her fingertips.

you resist, the dawn’s first touch as cold
as the depths of the boneyard in its darkest hour,
but the gentle kiss of radiant light awakens you,
casts away the shadow you’ve let fall behind,
and guides you to the mouth, the opening, to freedom.

Cause and Effect

/ lovizmytrio / 2 Comments

If you suspend a student
for inappropriate behavior…
he’s going to have to make up his work.

When he makes up his work,
you will mark it late.

When you mark it late,
he’ll probably go whine
to his mama and daddy.

He may even ask for some new
baseball shoes as well.

When he asks for the new shoes,
he’ll show them off to all his friends
when he comes back to school.

When he comes back to school,
his parents will complain
to all administrators that his papers
are marked late.

The administrators will tell you
that suspensions are excused absences,
so…

He’ll want to turn in his papers…
with all As.

You’ll have to fix up your gradebook,
edit all of his mistakes,
and lose sight of why you became a teacher.

When all his grades are fixed,
you’ll notice that he plagiarized
some of his work.

You’ll have to suspend him again.

And chances are, if you suspend him…
he’s going to have to make up his work
and you’re going to have to give in
to the idiocies of our society.

Cloud

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i want to be outside of the cloud,
to see the silvery circle of sun
touching the beauteous palm of Earth,
to float above everything below me,
to let the raindrops fall from my wisps
of Heaven-sent dewy collections,
to release within my realm of realization
every bit of darkness that keeps me
here inside this churlishly cold cloud.

Announcement

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you wouldn’t want to know
how i see the world
how its shadow always hovers
over its light

i wish i could push the clouds away
and hold in my hands the smiles
that pop out as easy as dust mites
on my children’s faces

but i feel the rain following me
the wind pushing at my cheekbones
and i wonder how i lost
where i lost
that innocent smile
that announcement of
i don’t have a horrible childhood
that they’re so sure to tell me
that i’ve worked so hard to create.

Without Your Words

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

without your words
your hippie style of teaching
your gathering in groups
your relentless rule-breaking
your freedom-comes-first
your choice-is-the-best-choice
i wouldn’t be a teacher

and yet

i am trapped under piles of
standardized tests
computerized reading programs
administrative book doctrines
absentee students, parents
and find your words difficult to read

i wish i could capture them from memory
snap up the beauty of the classroom
that my children will never know
in thirteen years of institutionalized “care,”
that i could take your vision of education,
walk it right down to Washington
and make the world the place you promised
me it was capable of being.

Half

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if i could be half of who you are
the world would shine
an untouched wilderness of beauty
that no human could destroy

if i could be half
hearts held in hands would melt
kindness would seep through the air
like a feathery soft summer breeze

half of you
would be the full circle of the moon
lighting our way into the silver circle of dawn
the touch of newness fresh on our skin.

if i could be half of who you are
my nights would rest with seamless sleep
i would see the world for what it could be
never for what it is not.

i would be whole.

Slip

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blood working its way
into every capillary,
fingertips unable to stop
trepidatious air-tapping,
her outlandish words,
my lividity alive
as you walk in
to this simmered-down
moment of fraudulent calm

i stand without words
as you disappear
reappear
and place the thick slip
of her punishment before me

she will walk away,
saunter down the hallway,
continue on with
her outspoken life,
forgetting everything
before she swallows her lunch

but i will hear
only your whispered version
of the truth
the subtle (yet so obvious) gesture
and your strength
slipped in on carbon copied paper
that i can borrow for one day.

Riddle

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

you never end
you never begin
you are neither here nor there
you are lost to all touch
yet i feel you everywhere

you are my strength
you are my weakness
you are everything i hate and love
you are the epitome of endlessness
yet i feel you nowhere

you are the spring
you are the fall
you are the song that sings
you are the night and day
yet i feel you sleeplessly

you are behind me
you are in front of me
you make me who i am
you make me who i don’t want to be
yet i will never escape.