we stand scorched by sun
for a staff pic no one wants
on fragile bleachers
this after staff talk
the same pointless PowerPoint
that’s plagued our careers
after late release
of the rowdiest last class
prisoners of bells
after no planning
scheduling glitches abound
grade books that won’t load
after absent kids
gone for testing, Muslim Eid
gaping holes in class
after percussion
the endless percussion of
kids who can’t sit still
after fall won’t start
with no air conditioning
and no new pay raise
and you want to teach?
it sucks the life out of you
(but—kids blow it back)
choices
Sunset Run
no sunset pictures
just sore legs from running fast
alongside my girl
never thought i’d see
any of mine take to sports
proud to trek along
Dawning
with the house half packed
my morning commute haunts me
no more sunrise walks
Leaves
stomach tumbling
with sick realization:
innocence now lost
just three days ago
she was climbing up the limbs
of youth’s bulging tree
her arms strong and thin
(but what was bulging inside,
ready to burst free?)
to know that she knows
kills me from the inside out
(as a mom, a slave)
failures drop like leaves
of youth’s impending autumn
to crunch with my woes
i’ve always loved leaves
(but there’s no satisfaction
in this kind of crunch.)
she searches hollows
to fill a hollow within
(i’ve searched too. in vain.)
to know that she knows
brings every dark doubt to light
(no tree-limbed safe-net)
what will she climb next?
(the strong arms of a stranger
who will leave no leaves…)
a mom’s greatest fear:
to lose children to branches
that i cannot reach
Denver ReCycled
through cycling
in and out of neighborhoods
brick by brick, i fell
love lost, and then won
bungalow to bungalow
my city wooed me
the wheels spun me back
(sold my heart to Cheesman Park)
from bad-boy breakups
all along back streets
Park Hill, Cole, Cory Merrill
like love at first spin
bikes are trendy now
(they’ll dress like freaks to prove it)
but my bike love lives
in this uphill ride
with mountain sunset backdrop
my girls guiding me
i see them falling–
street by street, scraped knees and all–
in love with my love
Day Dealings
sunset on this day
can’t capture light nor finish
what the day has dealt
i’ll run till i die
or die trying to run free
from days that chase me
Credibility
i don’t ask for much
(credit where it’s due would do)
and a little faith
you’ve given neither
but i won’t back down, i won’t
(they’re worth fighting for)
someday you’ll see that
(or maybe you won’t; but me?)
i’ll credit their fight
Cross Country
weekend leftovers
murmur an early Monday
in my groaning gut
technology blues
plague two classes, one meeting
forced into nonsense
data collection
begins my singular plan
till phone rings: sick kid
frazzled packing up
for a stomach flu faker
then two extra kids
but that is not all!
cross country registration
at the last moment
my middle girl runs!
two days a week, a new plan:
laps around the park
(he can cook dinner–
we’ll eat late like back in Spain,
shed this U.S. stress)
and i will run too–
take tree-lined tech-free views home
(run free, not ragged)
YOLO
my first orgasm
given to a boy now dead
life’s too fucking short
my childhood park
lit under a cloudy moon
is what calms me down
i’d walk the world
to find my way back to you
eighteen years in, love
we’re all grown up now
me a woman, you a man
let’s let bygones… be
there’s no other moon
to shine city-bright tonight
just my love, your love
Two Too Many
end of day feet up
hours on end of walking
then pickup, dinner…
day two of two jobs
the runaround’s new to me
exhaustion takes time
the girls say it best:
hang the dolls on bike rack noose
and call it a day
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