choices

Music

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

the leaves left from fall
dance across our patio,
their crisp skeletal skins skidding
to the howling background hymn.

this same howling harmony
danced across the road today,
beating me down to my bones
as i pushed toward a quieter tune.

trapped inside a fluorescent prison,
i couldn’t quite find the melody
that with a few angry notes
the wind whipped out of me.

perhaps you stand somewhere
on the other side of the sky,
unable to hear the song i sing
amidst the howling, haunting music.

Writing My Bike

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

it came to me in the summer.
Writing My Bike:
this should be the name of my new blog.
will i only write when i ride?
will i only ride when i write?

winter’s creeping in
with bitter cold mornings
that make my pedals run stiffly,
my layered legs tight with frost,
my mittened hands gripping
the first wisps of light on early mornings.

He may try, but Jack Frost can’t deter me.
i’ll be writing my bike to the top
of a mountain in May (racing a train),
and i need these legs to pedal me
through everything that will come
between now and then.

Advent

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we’re counting down
and can’t even begin
without a fight.
the felt openings
hold only mini ornaments
this year, no candy.
we’re trying to cut back,
though you can’t seem
to understand why.
this should be the advent
of happiness. perhaps
we can reinvent ourselves
and come, reborn, tomorrow.

Thanksgiving

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

i am better at this
just as you taught me
hand over hand
hand over arm
hand on hand
hand on arm

and now you?
calm as a summer breeze
in the midst of frigid temps
cradling them
in the layers of love
that were missing
from my childhood.

instead i’ll stand here
mashing my angst into potatoes
dicing up boiled eggs
slicing perfect candied yams
doing everything you taught me
and more.

the table is set.
the kitchen is spotless.
my children are loved.
and i should be so thankful
that i know how to do
all that i know how to do.

Au Revoir

/ lovizmytrio / 2 Comments

you may as well be a ghost
because you’ve haunted me more than most.
why do i have to see you here
when i’m surrounded by holiday cheer?

you’re embarrassed, though you won’t admit it
it is not my sin that you committed.
if you disliked the person you came to know
then why did you put on such a show?

i don’t edit, though it’s caused me pain
at least i’m real; you’re filled with shame.
perhaps those who love me are few and far
but at least i know how to say au revoir.

Is This My Year?

/ lovizmytrio / 1 Comment

is this my year of
baggage dug up from
depths beneath the earth
where i thought i’d buried
every last tag of remorse?

is this my year of
bricks stacked up along
a wall that keeps me
from where i am
and what i ache
for on the other side?

is this my year of
rain poured over my soul,
quenching the ardor
beneath my skin,
drowning my senses
until i can no longer breathe?

is this my year,
my year that i have to
let them go
let them go
let it, let it go?

Offstage

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

I’m still here
though only a shadow
of who you think you know.

i’ve shined my light
a bit too bright
so i think i’ll step offstage.

it’s comfortable here
behind these velvet curtains
i’m not questioned, not uncertain.

but i see you trying to peek,
wondering how i learned to be meek.
what i learned instead? how to be me.

How to Live on One Salary (Remix)

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

1. Forget about owning a new car. If you can’t forget it, stop reading now. You can eliminate up to $800 a month in payments if you don’t have a car payment and its ensuing expensive insurance.
2. Buy the minimum coverage for car insurance. Take a risk. It’s worth it.
3. Pay off all your debts (other than mortgage) before you consider it.
4. Save for retirement in a 401K, 403b, or whatever you can. It may be the only money you save for a while. But it’s something.
5. Take advantage of refinancing when the interest rates are at their lowest.
6. Eat at home 90% of the time.
7. Bike or carpool to work.
8. Use your tax returns wisely: pay off debts, save a little, use the rest for a small vacation.
9. Speaking of vacations: drive. It’s better for the environment, less scheduled, and more up to you. Have kids? Drive at night. They’ll sleep, you’ll be happy.
10. Buy used. Buy used. Buy used. I just bought three sweaters, a hat, and two nice pairs of pants for work at the Goodwill for $22. Brand-name products that look brand new. Craigslist is a great place to find virtually anything you need, from kids’ toys to bikes.
11. Create a monthly budget. Stick to it as much as possible.
12. Expect the unexpected. Cars (especially the old one you’re driving) will break down. It’s better to put it on a credit card you can pay off in a few months than to pay a car payment.
13. Do a babysitting exchange with another family. Enjoy an occasional night out without the extra cost.
14. Look for sale items at the grocery store and stock up.
15. Cancel your cable. You can watch a variety of things on the Internet, and Netflix is much more affordable. There’s nothing on TV anyway.
16. Get books and audiobooks from the library. Music too.
17. For gift giving, take advantage of after-Christmas sales and stock up on kids’ toys and Christmas wrapping paper. Flip the wrapping paper inside out to wrap gifts for every occasion.
18. Give up hair dyeing, manicures, pedicures, and salons. You’re beautiful the way you are.
19. Weather-proof your house as much as possible to save money on energy costs. Use cold water for washing clothes.
20. Decide what you really need to buy versus what you want to buy. Make sound choices, and you’ll have extra money (occasionally) to blow on fun items.

Pastured Cow

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

black and white
today, yesterday
calm and fright
there is no gray

a pastured cow
a startling contrast
the future now
my mind the past?

i take away
i give it back
they sway and sway
with words attack.

tomorrow is now
and blindingly bright
this pastured cow
shall see the light.

Idiom (Idiot!)

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

you have taken the cake
on an already black-letter day
putting your foot in your mouth
and ruining every cliche.

it’s raining cats and dogs
but you beat around the bush
i wish the cat had my tongue
instead you’ve turned shove to push.

i’m about to blow my top
because you’ve gotten out of hand
your idiom (IDIOT) won’t stop
but I am not a yes-woman or man!

you have worn out your welcome
I’m not wet behind the ears
you may think I’m wishy-washy
but you’re jumping the gun on your tears.