The Same Zip Code

we make home visits to welcome freshmen
who haven’t set foot in our school.
on the drive we discuss gentrification,
how these kids are coming across town
to our school because they think it’s better
(but it’s so much better than the remnants
of gangs that linger in their northwest ‘hood,
in the high school that hasn’t caught up
with the white money-chasers)

inside the first house, a blond bombshell
(shy as a country field mouse) lets us into
her gutted bungalow, replete with
granite counters all around, tells us she chooses us
because the people at our school were nicer
than the pompous competitor next to City Park

we make our way back to the south side
and step into a mansion built
on top of one of Denver’s many scrapes,
with oriental rugs leading from
hallway to music room to never-ending kitchen,
with a nice mother and a moody teenage boy
who grunts responses to questions
(because manners can’t be bought)

and then, within the same zip code of
block after block of mansions that
have all but stomped out the middle class,
we pull up to our last stop:
The Red Pine Motel,
settled along Broadway
between a bar and a pot shop.

in a tiny apartment without a table,
a man stands eating a bowl of soup,
his hand half broken and bandaged,
his pony tail tied at the nape of his neck,
his high-heeled wife potty training
her three-year-old in the adjacent room.

“you can come and look, do your check,
do what you need to do.”
we exchange glances.
do they they think we’re the cops?
are they used to this?
my colleague reassures him that this is a friendly visit,
that we have papers and t-shirts
and hope for a better tomorrow
(God save us all)

we sit on the bench-like singular piece of furniture
in the kitchen/living/dining room,
(no more than 100 square feet)
with a miniature gas stove and not a single
speck of a counter, granite or otherwise

the boy is running late
and both parents engage in disgruntled talk
when he arrives,
and they plain as day tell us what he’s like
and he plain as day answers.
they use words like imaginative.
engaging.
photographic memory.

and the little girl sports her
oversized South Future Rebel t-shirt,
and the uncle waits outside and begs
to have a t-shirt too,
so proud are they of sending their boy
on the one mile
(the one million mile)
walk between their dwelling and
the grandiose Italian architecture
that will be his high school,
where he will walk past
block after block of mansions
in the same zip code
through the disappearing middle class
into the institution
that will grant him a future
or place him right back
into the thin line of poverty
that hovers over our city.

and this is what it’s like to be a teacher
in today’s world.

The Buck that Burns Across My Back

It is 14:52 on the eve of ESL summer school. We have spent an entire day, AN ENTIRE DAY, planning for a sixty-five-minute lesson from curriculum that we first laid our eyes on this morning after a completely different and unrelated ENTIRE DAY presentation of curriculum yesterday. And at this moment, he announces that tomorrow, for the first day, the schedule will be “different.” That all our lesson planning has just been flushed down the toilet that has become our society.

I cried on my two-mile walk this morning. Not because it was too hot, or the views of the Perfect Denver Neighborhood weren’t impeccable. Or because I had to teach summer school for four weeks to pay for summer camp for my girls for ONE. But because of an article I read about the University of Phoenix, of all things. About how, in five years, their enrollment has decreased by fifty percent. And starting July 1st, a new law will require that they prove that their graduates make enough money to pay back the loans that their for-profit greed has forced them to take.

I was thinking these things as I made my way across town to the locale of this year’s grant-funded summer school, the University of Denver, a NONprofit institution with gorgeous grounds and transgender bathrooms and air conditioning and classes that start at $1200 a CREDIT.

And how screwed I am. Not because I think that the University of Phoenix is so damn amazing that it could grind up the 100-year-old trees of Denver’s “Ivy League of the West.” But because I have to do this. I have to do this damn summer school and have a part time job as an adjunct-but-never-real professor, that I have to bend my will to the beck and call of disorganized, incapable-of-communicating administrators, all for the buck that burns across my back.

That the measly $600 that I sometimes earn in a month at the University of Phoenix is sometimes all that keeps us from bowing down to debt.

And when he comes in at 13:33 and tells me that they haven’t been able to contact more than 11 students for our summer school, I ask him if it will be cancelled, if I will be shit out of luck on all counts this Tuesday. “No worries… it’s already accounted for… a grant. No pasa nada.” And his blue eyes and Argentinian accent are slappable. “And who paid for it?” I demand, the third time in two months I’ve asked, a question he’s dodged until this moment. “Well… you have. The taxpayers. The READ Act.”

And it all circles back to me. The University of Denver grounds I stand on that have been manicured by professional gardeners. The school I could never afford to attend, nor will any of my children even think of applying to. The public education that is filled and funded with so many holes, twenty-seven gorgeous textbooks, full-color photos and activities galore, a slew of classroom supplies including an electric pencil sharpener, that 11 students will take advantage of … all the rest? To waste.

The “for-profit” evil University of Phoenix that has allowed my family to break free of the paycheck-to-paycheck cycle that is a teacher’s salary, that allowed us to live on a pittance in Spain, that has allowed me to… breathe.

What is an education worth? Why won’t parents commit to a forty-five minute bus ride for free materials, expert teachers, individualized classes, and free breakfast and lunch? Why won’t the University of Denver be asked to publish data on how many students graduate with a super-fancy psychology degree and start their salaries at $22,000? Why won’t our government ever just see that EDUCATION SHOULD BE FREE??

This is my Tuesday. Let the games begin. The Hunger Games, real world style.

Recycle

a wasted training
 a waste of district dollars
 a waste of my day
 
 but at six-thirty
 they shoveled mud off the path
 giving me my ride
 
 at least there’s a view
 a day’s cycling release
 to shed off the waste
 
 

Cycle Through It

a flooded river
 can’t keep pedals from the path
 when at last there’s sun
 
 

The New Drive-In

summer-teasing sky
 in the midst of finals week
 beckons this field trip
 
 free lawn movie night
 we can pretend school’s out
 just four days early
 
 

Return

sunny skies return
 for a barbecue birthday
 mimosas and love
 
 perfect city walk
 through the perfect Denver ‘hood
 gold gardens galore
 
 kids with grandparents
 treasuring these small moments
 till the rain returns
 
 

Corners

what you can’t see here
 cornered by twilight sun-clouds
 i hold in my heart
 
 the rays sparkling
 in near-invisible rain
 quiet end to day
 
 corner of my heart
 sparkling in silver streaks
 silver streets of home
 
 

A Visit from Charles Schwab

a day off of work
 for three hours with students
 plus!–small donation
 
 refugees’ lives
 summarized in two chapters,
 questions that plague them
 
 if they saw their day,
 their actual student day,
 they might learn something
 
 instead, they murmur
 over plot complexities
 and students’ English
 
 they might realize,
 when to mansions they return,
 the true complex plot:
 
 they can’t give answers
 to high school reading questions
 nor inequity
 
 work, in equities:
 invest in students, not stocks.
 buy them a future.
 

The Dark Side of Testing

Dear Mr. John Fallon, CEO of Pearson:

“If you’re going to send me out, you better fucking send him too! What the fuck is this, he threw shit at me!”

This is not a post about testing.

It is about what you don’t see, as a corporation who thinks it would be amusing to test children for eleven hours out of their instructional year (on top of classroom tests, reading tests, English language proficiency tests, and district tests). It is about the other side of testing, the weight that bears down on us (teachers, students, parents, administrators) as we face each day with another disruption.

Not only did the students miss an entire week of instruction in March, but they also must have their schedules disrupted for a solid two weeks in May, in addition to the already-in-place finals schedule?

As Mark Twain said, “Teaching is like trying to hold thirty-five corks under water at once.” Try holding them under water after two months of testing, two weeks of a different schedule, and one hour and forty-five minute classes. I don’t know about you, but the last time I wanted to spend a solid 105 minutes on a task, it was a date with my damn pillow. Try entertaining/testing/questioning/reading with/TEACHING a bunch of fourteen-year-olds for that amount of time. It’s a recipe for disaster.

Hence the outburst at the beginning of this post, at the end of day three of this schedule, when we’d all about had enough. It didn’t matter that I picked a book just for kids like him, about a refugee from South Sudan. It didn’t matter that we were about to watch a documentary about the real struggle of Lost Boys. It didn’t matter that I care about everything that we read, speak, and think in my creaky-floored, ever-hot urban classroom. All that mattered was that he–and I–and all of us had reached our limit.

With my other classes, we went to the library to check out books. Upon arrival, we witnessed the mass of students who opted out of the PARCC and were sitting listening to music, streaming videos, and losing another three and a half hours of instruction this week because their parents had the gall to stand up to this nonsense, but not the ability to come and retrieve them from the school.

This is what you don’t see, Mr. CEO with expertise in the “financial sector.” This is not about money. This is not about students’ abilities to meet a standard set forth by a corporation. This is not about a test.

It is about human lives, human quality of life, that with your impossible expectations and complete lack of experience in AN ACTUAL SCHOOL, you couldn’t possibly understand. Make the test digital! Have you ever thought for one moment that my school district, along with thousands of others, doesn’t have a computer for every student like your $8.6-billion-dollar-profit-in-one-year company can provide for its employees? And because of that, testing has to be spread out over days, weeks? Have you ever thought that the questions you ask students, that have been formulated by a team of specialists wanting to sell curricula to failing schools across the country, can’t even be answered by well-educated adults? Have you ever been a School Assessment Leader, a now-full-time position in every school in the nation, trying to balance the lives and supervision of pre-ACT, ACT, PARCC, ACCESS, Interims, SRI, and AP tests in the 180-day school year? (On that note, have you thought about when we would actually have time to do our jobs–TEACH?)

This is not a post about testing.

It is about the dark side of testing. The students who shout out that, “If this test doesn’t count for our grade, and doesn’t determine the classes we can take next year, and doesn’t count towards graduation, then why do we have to take it?” It is about the dark shadow that falls upon schools that are filled with impoverished children, abused children, children whose first language isn’t English, refugees, immigrants, affluent children, apathetic children and children who care more than anything about their education, and the teachers who commit most of their lives to their love for these children, and your. TEST. IS. MAKING. THEM. HATE. US.

Have you thought for a minute, a singular minute, to set foot inside a school? To see for yourself what the students see? To sit for one hour and forty-five minutes in ninth grade English, have a measly five-minute break, then go through the bug-ridden process of trying to log on and then take a math test in geometry that includes trigonometry questions that they won’t study until eleventh grade? Have you visited the students in the library who have lost half a week with the teacher who they wrote cards of gratitude for during teacher appreciation week?

Have you thought for ONE MINUTE about the human effects of your test?

This is not a post about testing. It is a post about you. About your company. About our society. About the people who chose this career not for a profit but for the love of children. They are not profit centers. They are not machines who can be reprogrammed to obediently accept all we dish out.

They are our future.

Please, Mr. Fallon. Let us be sure that we will still have a future to look forward to. Visit a school. Talk to a child. Be something other than a test.

Because this is not a post about testing.

Cinco de Mayo

free Sunday funday
 festive city opens spring
 with cartwheels and dolls
 
 

Location:S Saint Paul St,Denver,United States