diapers

Before You Can Blink

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

Just like us, twenty-one years back, they were walking their two dogs. The sun was ready to set, and their dogs would plop down on their laps later, ready for a rest. They were grinning in the golden light of the first day of fall, so young and beautiful.

She wore a black t-shirt that accentuated her bulging belly, he a ball cap and a matching shirt. No worries on a Saturday night. Just get the dogs home, put the baby-in-the-belly to bed, watch a flick, go to sleep.

But they had to gawk at me. Crane their necks for the scene I was making.

“Just ONE PIC!!”

I was begging; pleading.

No, it didn’t matter that they’d rushed through the fancy meal I’d spent hours preparing. That their friend was late and didn’t even have a bite. That the remnants of the Minnesota Wild Rice stew were spilled across the kitchen. That their friends were already in the park taking sunset pics.

That this is the last Homecoming.

And goddamn it, I needed JUST ONE PIC.

My baby girl, her friend since sixth grade, her friend since ninth grade, her other friends waiting at the park.

Just. One.

Because this is my last Homecoming.

I looked over at the expecting couple, turning the corner but still craning their necks as I squatted down, iPhone on pulse mode, trying to capture the snark, the impatience, the beauty.

“Oh… you’ll be me before you can blink,” I shouted, and they laughed and laughed and laughed as they walked down the block, not knowing how hard those coming months, years, moments would be. How they’d be begging for one picture, one moment with their baby, their child, their… young adult.

How quickly these sunset moments flash before our eyes.

Before you can blink, they are gone.

Ages and Stages

/ lovizmytrio / 1 Comment

this parenting age
 with their school-age arguments
 is harder for me
 
 i’d take diapers, cries
 over back talk, bickering
 that leaves me crying
 
 parenthood lesson:
 it never gets easier
 heartbreaking my days
 
 
 

Diaper, Sleep, Eat, Repeat

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

I have forgotten
Though it hasn’t been long
How demanding they can be
Diaper, sleep, eat, repeat,
The new mother’s mantra
And with three older girls in tow
Whose needs include swimming
Riding scooters and being read to
(not to mention the daily dose of
Laundry, floor cleaning, groceries
And being a professional chef)
I am forever grateful for two things
In Kentucky summer, Week Two:
one, Bruce is here to save the day
And cut the work in half, and two,
Elizabeth comes home to her every
Afternoon and rises with her at night.

No More Birds

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

she chirps and coos like
a little bird and laughs
with the touch of an angel,
but when she screams and
won’t go to sleep, and fills
her diaper with a proud giggle,
i am reminded of why, while i
love her, am still happy at the
end of the day to hand her off
to mom, to tell my girls to go
to the bathroom, brush their
teeth and hair, listen to a story,
and go (without crying once in
the night) to bed.

How to Live on ONE Salary in Today’s World, Day Two

/ lovizmytrio / Leave a comment

So, $1200 per month to pay the remainder of the bills for a family of four with two stubborn girls still in diapers? Well, it’s not so hard really if you’re willing to sacrifice a few things. For one, neither of us had a cell phone, gasp! I mean, what is the purpose of a cell phone, really? It’s to communicate during emergencies, and in that case, Bruce could just call me at work. Since then, we have purchased cell phones, but even now, we only use pay-as-you-go phones, paying probably less than $10 a month, TOTAL.

Also, we were not paying for cable TV and at that time had dial-up Internet, which I know isn’t the greatest, but it still worked. These are all simple ways to cut costs: think about what you REALLY need. MUST you watch HGTV or have the highest connectivity, or can you make some sacrifices?

Without those expenses, we still easily spent $500-$600 per month on groceries, but cut our food expenses tremendously by almost never going out to eat, a habit that was admittedly difficult to drop, as we had been accustomed to that lifestyle for six years of marriage. But you have to do what you have to do. Part of that also includes switching stores, though it’s tough to give in to this, and primarily shopping at Wal-mart. Their prices are easily half, and at the very least thirty percent, less than a typical grocery store. Once I discovered this, I knew we had to make that choice, grievances aside.

Back to the diapers… we used cloth diapers, so we weren’t spending $60 a month on diapers. Our water bill may have been a bit higher, but it has always hovered around $60 a month.

So where does that leave us: $540-640… Because of our good driving records and having old cars (yet another benefit of not buying a new car), our car insurance is less than $40 a month. Yes, that’s right people: LESS THAN $40 a month!! Some things, however, are out of our control, such as the energy bill, which can easily rise to $240 in winter months. We have always tried to balance this out by paying $150 every month, therefore crediting our account, even when the bill in the spring or summer is as low as $80. This is just another simple way to cut costs: look at the whole picture and make it work by balancing things out.

Assuming that we had an expensive grocery month, that leaves us with $350 for everything else: phone, clothing, trash, gas, insurance… and tomorrow, the great insurance debate… in my words and ever-so-bold opinions…