The Other Side of Sorrow

before dawn alarm
lesson planning just can’t wait
always on my mind

six a.m. invite
curly-haired house of welcome
piano and grins

inside the lead walls?
plea for more books, print, copy
teach the world’s kids

order sympathy
on an unsigned card of hate
my heart sees flowers

psychologist’s help
ends with failing soccer star
begs for a grade change

policies can’t write
or change the screaming patient
that closes my day

teary, manly hugs
from those arms that ask for more
doctors don’t listen

at dark i drive home
day wholly spent on others
to hear more sad news

such is adult life
no more hide and seek for me
everything exposed

but how their eyes light
as they share their days’ stories
must. remember. JOY

Road, River, Range

It is probably best that you dissented. That Wii and dinner preparation were more important than this Sunday afternoon ride.

We all have our releases. Yours is cutting onions and spinning tires in an imaginary resort. Mine is spinning tires in the real world, on concrete paved just for my bicycle.

I was first out of the gate, ready to win. For one hour, I was not anybody’s mother. Anybody’s teacher. Anybody’s wife. Anybody’s (even the one who lost her baby) friend. I was just a cyclist, three words to my name: “On your left!!” shouted to the tops of the peaks. Ringing out over my music. Move out of my way because there are not enough miles, not enough breaths in my lungs, not enough songs on this playlist to pedal through this pain.

Only: Road, River, Range. That is all I wanted to see. That is all I wanted to pull into my soul this Sunday. Those blue Colorado skies, the perfectly paved path, the river that feeds us all, and the mountains that divide our continent. There is nothing in this world more beautiful than sweat trickling down a back, tight thigh muscles, clicking gears, and That View. I could live my whole life in that one hour, the numbness of nightmares disappearing with each and every mile.

Forget what she said on Friday. Or the horrible news that I might carry like a burden for three weeks and she will carry for a lifetime. Forget that I came home to discover my husband’s mother rests on her death bed and my little girls can’t quite wrap their minds around anything deeper than the five-house alley-walk to their friend’s house.

Forget it all for this one breath-stealing shout-out: Road, River, Range. Placed here for me, for all of us, to tackle with this perfect body someone gave me to live on this Earth.

The three R’s. Only a different lesson.

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Labor Day

baby stops mid-hill
after fifteen miles, done
she’s still my winner

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i will wait for her
as we end this Labor Day
she is my last one

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my beach day Denver
filled with beautiful sun girls
swimming and cycling

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dreams are made this way
blue skies, wood-fired pizza, sun
and spinning tires

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confluence meets park
bike path meets Vittetoe fam
we meet our happy

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summer’s end flowers
and a zip line that beats Spain’s
best spent allowance

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unions gave day off
for sleeping in and waffles
life’s a rented dream

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i think in haikus
in between Monday cycles
that bring creeks and joy

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Cycling Saturday

thirty-three mile ride
sunflowers to skyscrapers
all on a bike path

if this isn’t home
to find yourself on two wheels
Denver beckons you

no pictures today
tires spin too fast to stop
memory stores love

Prepubescent Exploration

innocent zoo trip
obscene scene not to be seen
look, he has two trunks!

saved by water show
he forgets his bold catwalk
trainer blames teen angst

stories of summer
popcorn, snow cones, puberty?
the birds and the bees

better lesson now:
friends by day’s end, sharing slurps
two trunks forgotten

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When I Come Home

windy uphill ride
ended with teddy bear warmth
symbol of our life

Agua de Vida

hot springs aquifer
sulphur carved what man could not
nature’s history

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Mountaintop

no pictures today
just a mental memory
we piqued on the peak

Failing

Here I am again. Nit picking away. Is this a sign of the times, a symbol of my year in Spain, or just another hassle like everything else?

I still haven’t been paid of course. It’s been three months. Not to mention the six months of hell and paperwork and thousands of dollars spent prior to that.

I just need to vent tonight. Bruce and I have spent ten hours today combing through all three girls’ hair, and my own, and finding more lice and nits than you could ever imagine. Add that to the laundry that we’re barely catching up on due to winter weather conditions, no dryer, and a north facing apartment. In fact, we can’t even run our washer and another appliance at the same time without the power going out. Truth is, we cannot run ANY two appliances without the power going out. Who came up with this back-asswards system, where the electric bill costs 150€ a month yet doesn’t consistently PROVIDE ELECTRICITY? I know I’m not the only one with this problem. I’ve heard others discuss similar problems, and on our travels we also ran into electrical snafus.

Add that to the serious lack of WiFi on the Iberian Peninsula, and I’m about done. The Internet rarely works well anywhere. We pay an exorbitant amount of money for ADSL and a phone with a data plan, and it’s designed for someone who doesn’t seem to actually USE it. Bruce tried to PAY for more megabytes today, and the web site locked him out!

The schools… I’ve complained a bit, but let me add on. My middle child has a gift. Not all of us are born with it, but out of my entire household, she is the one who truly has the gift of language. She has picked up more Castellano than the rest of us combined. Yet, the day before Christmas break, she came home with a report card with a failing grade in science, the equivalent to a D in Lengua Castellano, and a D in art (have I mentioned that she’s an artist and actually plans to make a career out of this?)? Her report card came with a note stating that she was pulled out for support for science and lengua. Upon further review (her interpretation), she is pulled out of class for those subjects, then put back in the classes (that she has then missed!) to take the exams, which are of course all rote memorization of facts. Not only that, but I didn’t receive any communication from the school, prior to the report card at the end of the term, either about the support classes or her FAILING.

I could pinpoint many reasons why this country is failing. But I think I’ll stick with lack of lice checks/healthcare, high bills that cover nothing, and schools that overlook gifts for rote memorization of facts, leading to a country filled with people who cannot provide basic services such as electricity, WiFi, or a paycheck.

La Infestación de Los Piojos

My View:

infesting nightmare
day lost to money, combs, baths
laundry for a week

Their View:

forever children
they compete for who has more
cheer to share a bed

Our View:

an experience
shared across generations
our everyday life