because it’s Monday
the alarm sucks, kids are bored,
and fall won’t happen–
the classroom burns hot
from a boiler turned on
two weeks too early
and everyone thinks
it’s a holiday today,
so here i sit. wait
at the Jiffy Lube
with the rest of the world
panning for oil.
this is white privilege.
this is American life.
black gold that burns all.
poetry
This Pussy Will Save Us!
And Then I Remember
This. This is why I teach. For three years she’s been in my class. She has gotten married. Had a baby. But she still can’t decode words. She still struggles with basic sentences. I know she has more going on in her mind than Bambara and Mali and motherhood, but I haven’t found a way to reach this girl. I haven’t been able to communicate with her in a way to help her understand. But “reliving” 1880s farm chores today, she said, “I got this. We do this in my country.” And today, today, today, she was the best at something. This. This is #whyiteach
Short This
ten years ago, as a young teacher,
i would have killed to have such a flawless lesson.
today?
one component makes me feel like a failure.
ask.
ask why teachers leave this profession in droves.
why we spend hours collecting fake data points to try to prove ourselves.
why every damn day they must be
interacting as if their intelligence
could not be shown in another way.
ask.
ask.
screw the introverts,
the six weeks prior of building up talk,
of transition handouts and forced verbal responses and
Socratic seminars.
this day, this day when i have them
writing more sentences in one period
than they’ve written in their entire
school careers,
i am judged as
not even approaching,
not even close to being good enough?
Ask.
i’ll tell you why.
because with all the hoops and all the hopes and all the reasons i came into this career,
some days,
rainy days like today,
dreary and plagued with doubt,
it sure as hell feels more like
an unsatisfactory career
than i feel like an unsatisfactory teacher.
Enough for Today
essay graphic done
by seventy-five percent:
mission accomplished
Falling in Love
autumnal offer:
a windy, sunny lunch stroll
in my favorite park
Over the Hump
piano serenade while cooking
and a collegial shout out to the king
can make a hump day joyful
in this little life we live
Stay Gold
from this flight: find light
carry it twenty years past
your flight-or-fight life
through the turbulence
of youth’s wanderlust wonders,
past career questions,
into the blue sky
of a healthy tomorrow
shined by little grins.
find the golden light
carried by heavenly wings
that kept you on Earth.
happy fortieth,
twenty years without cancer,
and still shining bright.
Tuesday, Taught
the kid argument
that plagues my mornings and nights
chips away my soul
Bites and Pieces
somewhere between the data crunch
that swallows all planning time,
the tech issues that chew up a third of every class,
the common planning that gnaws into bitching about work,
emailing counsellors about kids who’ve bitten off more than they can chew,
grading grammar that nibbles away time with my own kids…
there’s a teacher waiting,
the entrée of this piecemeal,
ready to share the most delectable taste
of what this world asks and offers.
