so simple, really:
the teens play cabin boardgames
while we ski for love




so simple, really:
the teens play cabin boardgames
while we ski for love




trapped in October
a winter snowfall gets lost
among leafy trees

my dog doesn’t care.
he loves snow as he loves me:
unequivocally

sometimes his love hurts
so pure is his devotion
(unreturnable)

like these autumn leaves
that can never give the tree
what it gave to them

My daughter’s face perfectly encapsulates my day, my motherhood, my career. Straining to run through the burning sun of a late summer day, pushing the limits of what she’s run before, and wishing for a closer finish line.
Disgruntlement at a too-hard, too-narrow concrete runway, making it nearly impossible, impassable.
Fear that her time will be worse than before, that the heat will beat her, that the world will beat her.
A sliver of hope for that final push, that final lap, that is just around the corner yet feels like twenty thousand steps too far.
In the background, teens cheer. “You got this!” “Just one more mile!” “Keep it up!”
Parents chase the runners, crossing the park’s midsection while they wrap their legs around its exterior shaded walkways. Parents trying to get the next best vantage point to capture that pic, that glimpse of angst that is in every athlete’s face.
Coaches stand on the sidelines, their own cheers tight with passion, with expectation and longing. “Lift your legs!” “Raise up those arms!” “Just like at practice!”
Her expression, their words, the globally-warmed, never-ending sun, beat down on the tumble of meetings that began and ended my day. The constant admonishments from my administration. The constantly shifting expectations and placement of people in power at my school district. The constant lack of a curriculum for the students who need it most and don’t have the right words, the right expression, to beg for that finish line. The constant task of preparing three hours of sometimes-failing lesson plans I must place in front of my Newcomers.
The rush–my god, the rush. Three weeks back, adding item number one thousand and seventy-three to our Google family calendar, Bruce rearranging his ever-strict hours to be able to make this meet, the shuffle of only-two cars, three girls in three activities with varying times, my after-work meeting, my cycle down the bike path, my fifteen-minute window to cross a park three times to gather this glimpse, my Torchy’s Tacos stop, bike locked and unlocked, bathroom locked and unlocked but only with a code, taco bag ripped on the rush up the elevator, only to find a buffet of snacks waiting in the final meeting room. My race to beat the moon home because it would never be light enough, our car in the shop for nearly six weeks, and I don’t even have time to fix the chain on my bike, let alone buy a decent headlamp.
All of this is in my daughter’s face. All the angst, the cheers, the backtalk, the doubts.
And just like her, I am racing to the finish line. It is never close enough, but both of us, somehow, have made it today. We have made one more race, one more step, towards what we hope will be better on the other side.
the storm has arrived
enough to bring shrieking youth
joy none of us find

yet the lake beckons
with its endless, silent joy
should we ask for more?


or live like ancients
who treasured every birchbark
for the life it gave?

red sun, glassy lake
paddling with the puppy:
perfect lakehouse day







Dear Minnesota,
How do you tease with lakes buried under ice for seven months that are swimmable by July?
How my Colorado blood envies your lack of altitude.
How windy you made this lake for three days until the dusk presented a photo-less calm that brought all eleven of us onto the water.
Even Ruby, just six, paddled to the bald eagle island halfway across the bay.
Even my mother, just sixty-five, tolerated the nearly-still lake.
You should have seen it with your non-existent books, your lack of information published online, your secret beauty buried beneath ponderosa pines and fish-hunting loons.
You should have told me that peat bogs and mosquitos mask the firelit perfection of summer.
That the North Woods encapsulate the fairy tale life we’ve all wished to achieve.
I should have known, Minnesota, that you were too good to be true.
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a sketchy bike ride
paddling against the wind
into the north sun
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morning adventures:
the kayaks’ gentle lilting
through freshwater lake




a tornado scare
led to this downtown hassle
with a sparkling Vista

delayed flight gave time
for a capitol your
offering domed wealth



my man has arrived
for our drive to the North Woods
where water saves all






from flat Dakota
emerges a river trail
hard on legs and kids



but water wins views
however it meanders
giving life to all


