Dear Fabian

I just want you to know that I tried my best. I loved you the best way I know how. I tried to show you the world–Glacier National Park, the Grand Canyon, Kentucky… Skiing in beautiful places. Camping under the stars.

I tried to make you a part of my family.

I tried to show you that structure and discipline are the way to a successful life.

I tried to save your money so you could have a future. You would have had $13,000 to start your life. Out of the $9000 I gave you, I likely spent $5000 trying to include you. To show you these beautiful things, places, and experiences. To send money, thousands of dollars, home to your family in Honduras. To love you. To offer you a safe home and stability.

I barely knew you, and I took you into my home.

And you lit a match and burned it all.

I hope to God you learn from this and treat the people in your future better.

I hope to God the next time someone changes their entire life to accommodate you, you show more respect. You WORK YOUR ASS OFF to use your intelligence for your future. You shut down your stubborn ass, ask for help, and apply yourself one hundred percent to work, education, and discretion.

I hope that one day, if you ever go back, you look at the Grand Canyon and say, in utter amazement and gratitude, “Thank you for taking me to this ever-stretching, carved-over-thousands-of-years glory, and sharing its beauty with me.”

I hope you learn from your mistakes and make something out of your life.

Nothing and no one is stopping you.

It’s all on you.

And don’t burn your bridges next time.

Road Trip 2021, Day Twenty-two (The Final Day)

before the long drive,
enjoy the perfect park. shop.
soak up cousin time.
eat your sister’s meal
till the next time you see her.
too long (just too long).
your daughters will drive.
together, we can make it.
we will rule the night.
it’s all we can rule
with the oldest off to school
we can rule the night.

Road Trip 2021, Day Twenty-One (Water)

cycling through hills
of perfectly green horse farms
before paddling
bucket lists are short
but should include Kentucky
for its soft beauty

Road Trip 2021, Day Twenty (Lex Beauty)

Kentucky surprise:
shadows, trees, sun, nieces, joy,
progressive murals
don’t assume you know
the beliefs of a red state
until you’ve been there

Road Trip 2021, Day Nineteen (Views)

sunrise on a pond 
a historic capitol
and these endless hills

Road Trip 2021, Day Eighteen (Memory Lane)

my grandparents’ store
in this perfect little town
where they’ll always rest
Uncle Tim’s hard work
built for them from the ground up
(now he’s retired)
the pond where we swam 
and where i brought my toddler
now off to college
how harsh time can be
taking everything away
yet giving us life

Road Trip 2021, Day Seventeen (Black Sails)

brown babe gull, black sails,
our last New England beach day
before the road home

Road Trip 2021, Day Sixteen (Boston)

the Constitution 
(a ship in Boston Harbor)
has won my man’s heart
a tavern lunch date
for our last family road trip
with all of our girls
all grown up, my girls
(they’ve been everywhere with us)
and soon they will fly

Road Trip 2021, Day Fifteen (Rhode Island Vibes)

a windy beach day
followed by farmers’ market
for tonight’s dinner

Road Trip 2021, Day Fourteen (ROAD Island)

this “bike path” presents:
sea-level cycling; beach
(rode on Rhode Island)
there’s seafood here, too.
and family filled with smiles
and gardening goals