Coronatine, Day Sixty-one

I went to the grocery store today, and I don’t want to write about the nightmare I had last night where no one was wearing a mask.

Could you imagine, three months ago, having a nightmare about people not wearing masks in Target?

Actually, King Soopers was well-stocked today. Everyone I saw had a mask on. People at 8:30am obeyed the one-way aisle rules, and best of all? I stayed within my budget.

I made a budget for my post-work husband, starting at the beginning of May. $200 a week. It may sound extraordinarily excessive, but we’ve got six mouths to feed, and these are American prices, after all.

But I bought extras today. This bugleweed. A roll of packaging tape. And sushi because fuck Wednesday cooking.

And, my nightmares should end soon.

Because my post-work husband got a job, a non-union, non-seniority-screws-you job, doing exactly what he’s great at and wants to do forever, in the midst of a pandemic.

And.

And you can call it what you want. White privilege. True. Luck. Absolutely. Divine intervention. Maybe.

Or just… fate. The fate that led him through the Air Force to me, that led the boy to our doorstep, that led three beautiful daughters into our home, that led his previous experience to him becoming the best candidate out of all the others being laid off.

Coronatine, day sixty-one. It’s a beautiful image filled with pets, hope, and love.

And I want to hold on to this non-nightmare feeling for as long as I can.

And.

This cat was born to be a model. Good night.

Coronatine, Day Sixty

like a pregnant mom

i wait for this peony

(bring blossoms, bring hope)

the first bloom beckons

all that is good on this Earth

(even the ants know)

Coronatine, Day Fifty-five

and from this soil

from blustery spring breezes

good news can blossom

Coronatine, Day Fifty-three

we flew this beach kite

on this day seven years back

(a dream in life, Spain)

my daughter, then ten

still finding joy in small things

(as i still try to)

aspen trees at dawn

a pup always by my side

cats learning to love

the kite is gone now.

(i have ransacked every room)

locked down, we let go.

Coronatine, Day Fifty-one

an uncommon mist

wrapped the morning in soft light

before the sun ruled

but blue sky is king

popping up my potatoes

for the love of May

all nine have emerged

and, like the peas, cling to life

brought by sun, water

this wins my heart now

as i fast between each sun

hope rising, falling

Coronatine, Day Forty

this is just to say

I have lost the art contest

to everyone in my dining room

they were so strong

and so detailed

so much depends upon

a teenage smile

giving a snarky peace sign

with an artist’s pencil

beside her sassy sisters

Coronatine, Day Thirty-eight

these organized shelves

ready to be fully stocked

with his last paychecks:

they represent us,

our Coronatine journal,

worry turned to work

work we’re still doing

with tiny pics on small screens

working for our kids

our creative kids

with a cat-house-building night

paw prints, love, and all

“new normal” softens

as we make the best of fate

on day thirty-eight

Coronatine, Day Thirty-seven

i’m back to haikus

(they suit the whole me better)

they’re written on bikes

the Denver sunshine

wins this quarantined Sunday

for those who listen

it seems so simple

to follow the rules. stay home.

be careful outside.

and at home? snuggle.

love the soft spaces of life.

soft spaces of love.

Coronatine, Day Twenty-five (Catch Me a Moon)

the moon rules this day

not knowing what happens here

(we wait in shadows)

empty city streets

spring trying to break branches

reaching for its light

another day ends

yet its return is constant

giving us new hope

Coronatine, Day Twenty-three

masks: the new normal

mine’s hand-sewn by my mother

not bad on a bike