Grown Not Flown

my childhood home

with trees my parents planted

taller than our lives

Road Trip 2020, Day Eight

along a river

this fairy tale ferry stop

has stood a beacon

in muddy waters

kids get to be kids all day

while mamas paddle

nature is our home

found in Kentucky fire

lit by desire

Road Trip 2020, Day Six (Turtles and All)

a creek paddle day

brings every boat together

for swimming and grins

Coronatine, Day Seventy-eight

solo hike with pup

not marred by weather; just bikes

but these flowers; views.

Coronatine, Day Seventy-five

should i post pea buds

or a bunch of trashed balloons?

(each its own beauty)

Coronatine, Day Seventy-two

the perfect respite

after seventy-one days

staying safe at home

mental sanity

in our short time here on earth

can be life-saving

hiking these mountains

with their divine mental cleanse

has saved us today

away from the crowds

away from constant worry

here. here we are safe.

Coronatine, Day Sixty-six

paranoia wins

my midday motherhood run

(let’s hope she’s healthy)

for now, let us plant.

petunias, lupine, sweet blooms

springing for summer

Coronatine, Day Sixty-two

we’ve risen at dawn

for two months of lonely walks

but look at our view

Coronatine, Day Sixty-one

I went to the grocery store today, and I don’t want to write about the nightmare I had last night where no one was wearing a mask.

Could you imagine, three months ago, having a nightmare about people not wearing masks in Target?

Actually, King Soopers was well-stocked today. Everyone I saw had a mask on. People at 8:30am obeyed the one-way aisle rules, and best of all? I stayed within my budget.

I made a budget for my post-work husband, starting at the beginning of May. $200 a week. It may sound extraordinarily excessive, but we’ve got six mouths to feed, and these are American prices, after all.

But I bought extras today. This bugleweed. A roll of packaging tape. And sushi because fuck Wednesday cooking.

And, my nightmares should end soon.

Because my post-work husband got a job, a non-union, non-seniority-screws-you job, doing exactly what he’s great at and wants to do forever, in the midst of a pandemic.

And.

And you can call it what you want. White privilege. True. Luck. Absolutely. Divine intervention. Maybe.

Or just… fate. The fate that led him through the Air Force to me, that led the boy to our doorstep, that led three beautiful daughters into our home, that led his previous experience to him becoming the best candidate out of all the others being laid off.

Coronatine, day sixty-one. It’s a beautiful image filled with pets, hope, and love.

And I want to hold on to this non-nightmare feeling for as long as I can.

And.

This cat was born to be a model. Good night.

Coronatine, Day Fifty-eight (Mother’s Day)

we’re stepping outside

into this beautiful yard

to celebrate love

it’s a bit risky

and only sixty degrees.

but it’s Mother’s Day.

each girl made a card

and worked to include this boy

in conversations

it’s as good as weeds

ripped from choking my garden

so beauty can breathe